If you read my blog last week I was in a very low place. I felt like my meds were not working. I felt like physical therapy wasn't doing a lot. All I could focus on is the here and now and it was miserable. Last week was a long, depressing weak.
Then Saturday came. Due to my work schedule, I sleep in pretty late on Saturday mornings in prep for my shift of no sleep on Saturday night. I woke up and stood up to find no pain, or at least very little compared to what had become the norm for me. I was slightly worried because I was set to start taking my higher dosage of Cymbalta and if you read my earlier blog, it had made me really sick. I was done with my 30mg doses and so I broke out the bottle of 60mg and said a prayer and took it. Work was crazy busy both days. I figured Monday would result in being back to normal pain, but surprisingly, it wasn't bad either.
I am still kind of shocked at such a turn around in my body. As miserable as last week was I was not expecting to feel good this week. Such positive things have been happening. I stepped on the scale and am down 5lbs. (I think that is mostly due to the 5-HTP that I have been taking to help me sleep. It apparently is marketed as a diet pill and I didn't know that.) I have been in better spirits as well. I can honestly say that after last week, I know what full blown depression is like. Like I said, I was at a major low point. So maybe my body just needs the higher dose of Cymbalta to help it. Physical therapy is making me stronger as well. I am NOWHERE where I need to be strength wise yet, but I can sure tell a difference since I started going.
They say time heals all wounds. I don't know if that is true in all cases, but apparently that is true with me. I feel like a new person to some extent. I am excited to see what the future holds. Hope is slowly returning and, although I am skeptical of my new found healthier demeanor, I feel like I'm finally starting to get better. So if you are reading this in the middle of a flare, hang in there. Last week I kept saying that tomorrow is a new day and it can always be better. Today is finally better. Keep fighting!
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